


hold the world to its best

by LiveLaughLovex



Series: our definition of perfect [14]
Category: Blue Bloods (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Future, F/M, Gen, Post-Season/Series 09
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-20
Updated: 2019-04-20
Packaged: 2020-01-20 17:43:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18529999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiveLaughLovex/pseuds/LiveLaughLovex
Summary: She'd had a long day, and she wouldn't be able to breathe again until she saw, with her own two eyes, that her little boy was fine, safe, and healthy, that he wasn't going to be taken from her suddenly.





	hold the world to its best

**Author's Note:**

> Title comes from "Light" by Sleeping at Last.

Eddie loosened the elastic holding her blonde locks away from her face the second she walked through the front door, allowing her hair to fall in tangled waves against her shoulders. As soon as that was done, she heaved a weary sigh and headed for the nursery.  

She’d had a long day. A little girl had vanished from her own backyard early that morning, and while they’d eventually found her, unharmed, in her father’s apartment, Eddie hadn’t been able to breathe since they’d been called in. She wouldn’t be able to breathe again until she saw, with her own two eyes, that her little boy was fine, safe, and healthy, and that he wasn’t going to be taken from her suddenly anytime soon.

Jamie was rocking their son to sleep in the corner when she entered the nursery. He glanced up when he heard the sound of her footfalls. He smiled at first, but the expression quickly faded into concern when he caught sight of the pained glint in her gaze. “Hey,” he murmured. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she breathed, closing her eyes for a moment. When she opened them again, she forced a smile, though she didn’t know why. It wasn’t as if Jamie hadn’t always been able to see straight through her when she lied about things like that. “Rough day at the office, that’s all.”

“Yeah, I heard about that little girl who went missing. Word around the 2-9 was that you’d found her, though.” Jamie stood carefully from the rocking chair, then stepped aside so that she could claim the seat he’d just vacated. “Here,” he whispered, carefully placing their snoozing son in her arms after she’d made herself comfortable. He hesitated for a moment. “She was okay when you found her, right? Nothing happened to her?”

“No,” Eddie rushed to assure him. “Nothing happened to her. Her parents are in the middle of an ugly divorce and an even uglier custody battle. Dad was afraid Mom was going to take off, so he grabbed the little girl before she could. They still share custody, so we weren’t even able to press charges.” She sighed quietly, still staring down at Flynn as he slept. “It wasn’t a big deal, really.”

“Maybe not in the grand scheme of things,” Jamie allowed. “But I’m sure it was a pretty big deal to that little girl’s mother, at the very least. How was she when you left her?”

“Happy. Relieved. You know, I’ve seen the survivors of bombings, of bank robberies, but I have never seen anyone as scared as that woman was when we went to interview her this morning.” Eddie smiled sadly, pressing a kiss to Flynn’s pudgy cheek. “I missed this little guy a lot today.”

Jamie nodded once, sighing quietly as he ran a hand down her back. “I wish I could’ve been there for you.”

“I know you do,” she murmured, smiling softly up at him. “But you’re here for me _now_. That’s what counts.”

He drew in a deep breath and nodded, leaning down to press a kiss to her flushed cheek. “I know it is,” he said softly. He ran a hand over Flynn’s dark hair. “I would never let anything happen to him, you know. To either of you.”

“I know that, Jamie,” she promised. “I know.”

“Good.” He stood there for a few moments longer, then gestured toward the door. “I was about to put him down and jump in the shower when you got home. You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” she reassured him. “We’ll be great. Go ahead and do that. The way you look right now, if you don’t do it soon, you might pass out in there.”

“I might,” he agreed, pressing another kiss to her cheek and then doing the same to Flynn’s. He glanced back at the two of them one final time before finally exiting the nursery and heading for the master bathroom.

Eddie refocused her attention on the baby in her arms. “Your daddy’s really worried about me,” she informed him quietly, her voice little more than a whisper. “I’m a little worried about me, too.” She sighed softly. “I don’t know if I was made to be a boss, _malo ljubavi_. It’s hard. Having to take the lead on these sorts of cases, it’s really hard. Especially now that we have you.”

Flynn shifted slightly in his sleep, curling closer to her. She held her breath, scared she’d woken him, but he settled back down within seconds, seemingly as content as always to be held in the middle of the night.

“I’m going to keep you safe,” she swore to him, pressing a kiss to his chubby little cheek. “And I will try to never let you down. I might fail every once in a while, but…” she blinked back the tears gathering in her eyes. “I’m going to do my best. And I’m never going to let anyone hurt you. As long as I’m here, I’ll have your back. That’s what mommies are for, okay?”

She caught his little fist in hers, smiled at him when his blue eyes – eyes so much like his father’s – opened and stared up at her. “You’ve got me,” she promised him once again. “You’re always going to have me. And I will always – _always_ – be your backup. You’re never going to be alone, _mali dečak_ , and you’re never going to get hurt. Not if I can help it.”

She used the hand not holding him to brush the tear from her cheek, then stood carefully from her seat and placed him gently in his crib after unwrapping the blanket. “Sweet dreams, Flynn,” she whispered. “I love you.”

She stayed there, standing over the crib, for at least another fifteen minutes. It wasn’t until Jamie came to stand at the door, his eyes full of such concern as he gazed in at her, that she finally left her son’s side.

“I don’t want anything to happen to him,” she whispered when her husband drew her into his arms and pressed a kiss to her hair.

“I don’t, either,” he murmured in response, guiding her carefully from the room and down the hallway. “I’m not worried, though,” he added after a few moments.

“Oh, yeah?” Eddie allowed him to lead her to the bed, then curled up next to him atop the sheets. “Why?”

“He’s got you for a mom,” Jamie replied easily. “It’s like being raised by Wonder Woman.”

Eddie smiled at that, but it faded away quickly as she stared at him. “I was so scared today, Jamie,” she admitted after a few moments, her eyes filling with tears once again. “I was so scared we weren’t going to be able to save her. If anyone ever took Flynn, I don’t know that I’d be able to…”

“You wouldn’t have to,” Jamie promised her. “And no one’s going to take him. They all know his uncle way too well. And you. They know you way too well, too.”

Eddie nodded once, her eyes drifting shut. “Today was hard,” she said after a moment.

“Yeah,” Jamie agreed without hesitation.

“Tomorrow will be better, though,” she said. “And the day after that. It’ll get better, won’t it?”

“You’ll get the hang of the sergeant thing,” Jamie hedged, not wanting to promise it’d get better. The world they lived in was still very much a terrifying place, after all, and not every child had half a dozen family members willing to declare war on the person who dared to lay a hand on them.

“Mm,” Eddie murmured. “I’m still going to call Bridget a thousand times tomorrow when she’s with Flynn, though,” she admitted.

Jamie laughed quietly, running a hand through her blonde hair. “I think she’ll cope,” he deadpanned.

With that, they both fell asleep for the night. And if Flynn woke up in his cot next to the bed that following morning, well, neither of them had a single thing to say about that, other than that the kid was clearly a genius.

**Author's Note:**

> malo ljubavi - little love  
> mali dečak - little boy


End file.
